Assertiveness: Lessons, Exercises, Activities, Handouts, Worksheets, E-Journals, E-Forms

Introduction to Assertiveness

• Lesson Content: What is assertiveness? How it differs from passivity, aggression, and passive-aggression.
• Formats: Web page, PDF lesson, Quenza psychoeducation path.

Assertiveness Self-Assessment

• Exercise: Clients rate themselves on a spectrum of passive → assertive → aggressive across various domains (work, family, relationships, boundaries).
• Formats: PDF worksheet, Quenza form, client portal assessment.

Knowing Your Rights: The Assertiveness Bill of Rights

• Handout: A list of personal rights (e.g., “I have the right to say no,” “I have the right to express my feelings”).
• Formats: PDF printable, app card, portal reference.

Identifying Passive, Aggressive, and Assertive Language

• Exercise: Clients read statements and categorize them.
• Formats: Worksheet with answer key, Quenza drag-and-drop activity, electronic form quiz.

Understanding Emotional Reactions to Assertiveness

• Lesson: Explore fears and beliefs that inhibit assertiveness (e.g., fear of rejection, guilt, shame).
• Formats: Psychoeducation handout, journaling worksheet, client portal reflection form.

The ABCDE of Assertiveness (CBT-Informed)

• Exercise: Identify the Activating Event, Belief, Consequence, Dispute, and Effective Response in situations where assertiveness is difficult.
• Formats: PDF worksheet, Quenza guided form, portal entry.

IFS-Informed Parts Mapping Around Assertiveness

• Exercise: Explore internal protectors, critics, and exiles that interfere with assertiveness.
• Formats: Visual worksheet, journaling prompts, IFS dialogue guide in Quenza.

Assertive Communication Scripts: The DEAR MAN Technique (DBT)

• Lesson: Teach the structure of DEAR MAN (Describe, Express, Assert, Reinforce, Mindful, Appear confident, Negotiate).
• Exercise: Clients write their own DEAR MAN scripts for real-life issues.
• Formats: PDF worksheet, editable client portal form, Quenza template.

Practicing “I” Statements

• Exercise: Convert blaming or passive-aggressive statements into assertive “I” statements (e.g., “I feel ___ when ___ because ___”).
• Formats: Web-based training, fill-in-the-blank PDF, client portal builder.

Boundaries and Assertiveness

• Lesson: Define physical, emotional, time, intellectual, and relational boundaries.
• Exercise: Identify areas where boundaries need strengthening.
• Formats: Boundary worksheet, client portal checklist, interactive module in Quenza.

Assertiveness Role-Play Planner

• Exercise: Clients write out and rehearse scripts for upcoming assertiveness challenges (e.g., asking for a raise, confronting a friend).
• Formats: Scenario planner PDF, practice log in portal, Quenza repetition prompt pathway.

Assertive Body Language

• Lesson: Eye contact, tone, posture, and gestures.
• Exercise: Clients assess themselves via mirror practice or video.
• Formats: Self-review guide, posture handout, video submission field in portal.

Values-Based Assertiveness (ACT-Informed)

• Exercise: Connect assertiveness to one’s personal values (e.g., honesty, autonomy, compassion).
• Formats: Values clarity worksheet, Quenza self-alignment path, form submission.

Challenging Cognitive Distortions About Assertiveness

• Lesson: Identify unhelpful thoughts (e.g., “It’s selfish to say no”).
• Exercise: Replace distortions with rational, compassionate self-talk.
• Formats: Thought record worksheet, cognitive challenge prompts, app-based tracker.

Nonviolent Communication (NVC) for Assertiveness

• Lesson: Observations, Feelings, Needs, Requests.
• Exercise: Practice translating conflict into NVC statements.
• Formats: Dialogue worksheet, roleplay handout, Quenza NVC builder.

Saying No With Grace and Integrity

• Lesson: Why “No” is a complete sentence.
• Exercise: Scripts for declining invitations, requests, or tasks respectfully.
• Formats: Practice form, confidence-building prompts, boundary builder PDF.

Receiving Criticism Assertively

• Lesson: How to receive feedback without collapse or defensiveness.
• Exercise: Practice distinguishing helpful vs. harmful feedback.
• Formats: Self-reflection worksheet, affirmation scripts, interactive quiz.

Assertiveness in Relationships: Conflict without Damage

• Lesson: Assertiveness as intimacy, respect, and cooperation.
• Exercise: Create fair-fight rules and shared values scripts.
• Formats: Couples worksheet, Quenza pair activity, portal co-journal.

Assertiveness in the Workplace

• Lesson: Communicating professionally with clarity and conviction.
• Exercise: Practice assertive email writing and performance communication.
• Formats: Email simulation worksheet, confidence checklist, portal tracker.

Assertiveness Challenge Tracker

• Exercise: Clients select 3-5 situations per week where they practice assertiveness and reflect on outcomes.
• Formats: Printable log, app-based journal, portal goal tracker.

Daily Micro-Actions for Building Assertiveness

• Exercise: Simple daily behaviors to build assertiveness muscle (e.g., speaking up in a meeting, making eye contact).
• Formats: Daily tracker PDF, Quenza habit card, portal rewards tracker.

Internal Self-Talk Coach for Assertiveness

• Exercise: Script your inner coach before, during, and after an assertive act.
• Formats: App-based cue card, journal prompt, editable affirmations.

Assertiveness Letter Writing

• Exercise: Write an unsent letter expressing feelings assertively to someone (for catharsis, rehearsal, or practice).
• Formats: Letter template PDF, secure portal journal, Quenza expression tool.

Celebrating Assertiveness Wins

• Exercise: Clients reflect on how they felt before, during, and after a successful assertion.
• Formats: Portal journal entry, Quenza success log, printable certificate of courage.

Assertiveness Relapse Prevention Plan

• Lesson: Normalize setbacks. Create a maintenance and motivation plan.
• Exercise: Identify triggers for passivity or aggression, and build a plan to stay grounded.
• Formats: PDF template, Quenza prevention worksheet, portal form.